If You’ve Died while taking Avandia – We Want To Talk To You!!!!

Come to Skeiser University, with our career oriented learning, and train to become unemployed in a new career!

I started having trouble doing simple things.  Going up stairs.  Riding a bicycle.  Pushing the shopping cart at the supermarket.  I exercise regularly and try to eat healthy, but this just wasn’t me.  I made an appointment to see my doctor, and you can imagine how surprised I was when he told me I was suffering from MLS…

Missing Leg Syndrome.

I never thought MLS might happen to me, so I never thought to look.

Thankfully my doctor prescribed ForMotorOil.

ForMotorOil is a new type of medication that multiple studies have shown can lower internal resistance allowing for faster healing and ease of movement.  Be sure and tell your doctor if you’re missing any other limbs or internal organs before starting ForMotorOil.  Patients missing their head, heart, or lungs were not significantly helped by ForMotorOil and may need further medical attention.  Cases of nausea, vomiting, sore throat, or unstoppable bleeding from the eyes have been reported.  Heart failure has been reported by nearby family members, but not by any living patients taking ForMotorOil.  Avoid driving or operating heavy evil bone-crushing machinery while taking ForMotorOil.  Irreversable complete personality change is possible.  Some patients of ForMotorOil have reported that they’ve never taken ForMotorOil.

Tell your doctor if you experience any of the above symptoms, sudden dizziness, shortness of breath, confusion,  frustration at higher food prices, tiredness while going to sleep or waking, or recurring dreams of a watermelon calling you rude names.

 

 

Please – don’t let this happen to you!  If you think you might be missing a leg, don’t delay – make an appointment to see your doctor now.

 

Have you or a loved one ever had a co-worker drop a pen or pencil near your desk at your workplace?  If so, you may be entitled to a cash settlement.  You might not even be aware of the workplace related emotional trauma from such an event. You could be suffering the effects and not even know it.  Time may be running out to file a claim so don’t delay.   Contact us to find out more.  UFILE-IPROFIT.com

[Non-attorney spokesperson.]

 

Was Elliot Gould the first Donald Sutherland?

Every day on TV we’re exposed to violence.  An almost a constant flow of  images and references to horrible afflictions, but these are not in the shows or programming.

I’m referring to commercials  and the side effects of medications…

Possibility of stroke, heart attack, risk of infection, reduced immunity, dizziness while rising or walking, difficulty breathing or swallowing, total loss of bladder control, anal leakage, joint pain, swelling, brain bleed, blurry vision, blindness, insomnia, weigh gain, weight loss, bone loss, nausea, vomiting, increased heart-rate, loss of appetite, involuntary movements which may become permanent, fatigue, uncontrolled outbursts of laughing or crying, confusion, mental illness, depression, thoughts of suicide, irritability, and death.